27.

i came to strange and painful  conclusion ..

i have 27 years and absolutely nothing.

how is that possible?

i was good student. i finish college, i'm good person...and i thought at 27 i will be..
but yet i'm not.

first to be clear. what is nothing? 

well when i say nothing i mean i don't have real job, i'm not married or engaged or in love, and in some crazy confusion i don't know what i really want to do with my life. to work as this or that or...

aw..so so confusing.

how did i get here?

well i don't really know.. i just know that my two last projects (and i am speaking about work) led me to this feeling. when you work hard, and hope for the best, and then because some other people all falls apart you can't stop feeling angry, and sad, and confused.. 

yes. 

so all this is because job. 

and what about love?

i'm not saying i don't miss that man, my man. but my love life was always a little bit lonely.. sad? maybe it is. i was always the girl all boys wanted (and not to brag but they still do) the problem was i don't want them. i believe in magic, in chemistry, in romance, in fairies and butterflies... but most in all that it's better to be alone than to be with anyone.

i hope, i know i will met him one day. and when i see him i'll just know. 

and like all things in life it will happened at some point, at some time. and i know i have to work on myself to be the thing i want to be before being his.

and after strange pain in my chest, and some deep sadness, and after letting myself pout for a while, i came to conclusion like i always do. start all over. again. from the start. 

i confess. it's little bit tiring, and overwhelming. but at the end that is life.

take a deep breath and wish for the best.